How to Teach Your Baby to Open Wide (When They Just Won’t Gape)

If your baby isn’t opening their mouth wide before latching, you’re not alone. And the good news? There’s a simple little trick that can help wake up that reflex—even when your baby isn’t at the breast or chest.

This is something I teach often when I see babies who’ve stopped gaping altogether. The best part? It’s easy. And fast. You can usually get the gaping reflex back online in just a few days—sometimes even less.

How to Build the Gaping Reflex

If your baby isn’t gaping at all when you bring them to the breast or chest, it might just be that the brain-to-chin pathway has gone a little quiet. Think of it like cobwebs—nothing is broken, but the signal just isn’t getting through.

This happens a lot when you’ve been putting your nipple directly into their mouth for a while. Over time, the reflex that tells their mouth to open wide doesn’t get used—and the brain kind of forgets it’s even there.

The good news? You can rebuild that reflex off the chest so that when it is time to latch, your baby is ready to go.

Helpful Tip

Think of it like knocking on the door. Sometimes no one’s home—but if you come back later, someone usually answers. That gentle repetition is what helps your baby’s brain reconnect the dots.

Try This Exercise

This works best when your baby is calm but still interested in eating—after a diaper change, or between sides during a feed. Here's what to do:

• Use your finger in a gentle “come here” position—straight up and down, with the knuckle ready.
• Place the knuckle under your baby’s chin. Be careful not to touch their lips.
• Hold for a count of 1… 2… 3… and then remove your hand.
• Wait a beat. Then repeat the same thing.
• Do this 6 or 7 times in one sitting. Most babies will start to gape around the third or fourth try. If they don’t? Totally okay. Just try again later today.

Think of it like knocking on the door. Sometimes no one’s home—but if you come back later, someone usually answers. That gentle repetition is what helps your baby’s brain answer more quickly.

Why It Works

The more you give your baby the chance to practice this reflex before you start latching, the easier it will be to cue once they’re in position.

So when you wrap their arms around you, line up belly to belly, tip their head back, and plant that chin on your chest?

Their brain already knows what to do. And that opens the door to a deeper, more comfortable latch.

Need More Help?

If your baby is struggling with opening wide before latching, and you want to understand why—and how to help—check out my related blog post here:

What to Do When Your Baby Won’t Open Wide Before Latching →